Mom has been, and purrobably always will be, a night owl, making her the last one to crawl into bed. When she finally comes to bed, she expects to have at least half of the king size bed, which is almost nevfurr the case.
Us guys have our own bedtime routine. Furrst and foremost, find the TV remote and purromptly turn on The Simpson’s (doesn’t evfurryone fall asleep to this 33 year old cartoon?). Once Dad gets supurr cozy, usually laying semi diagonal, he then politely pushes his legs ovfurr to make just enough space for me to get comfurrtable. Consequently, this only leaves a third of the bed left fur Mom – if she’s lucky.
To help Mom avoid this furrst world purroblem, I’ve come up with a few solutions to ensure her equal bed space.
1) Come to bed at a reasonable time. Anything after 10pm runs a supurr high risk of minimal bed space.
2) Consider sleeping with less pillows. Four pillows fur one purrson seems to be a bit much if you ask me.
3) Save fur a California king mattress (just please don’t take it out of my Turkey fund!). I bet this would almost guarantee equal sleeping space fur Mom, Dad, and me!
I wonder which option she’ll choose? Until then I hate to break it to ya Mom – ya snooze, ya loose.
I’m having a hard time keeping my peepers open, so if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to dream land. Nighty-night!